Original Title: I've been watching CNN for two minutes and I've already poured myself a whisky.

They've spent most of the time talking about Donald Trump's twitter account, and are pretending to be surprised that his live-tweeting is getting so much attention when CNN are the ones giving him that attention. Apparently posting shit on twitter is going to totally derail the democratic debate. Because Twitter is something extremely important that actually matters, rather than a social media website where we collectively scream into the void. And sometimes organize protests and political actions, but it's mostly screaming into the void.

So I look forward to a debate full of stupid and inane questions. I expect one of the Moderators to eventually ask the candidates what they think happened to #MH370, and whether it might have been aliens. Expect a question about something Donald Trump tweeted.

Currently they're in a lounge full of millenials talking about how young people have lots of red bull to keep them going.

I hate CNN.

Now I remember why I haven't watched them at all since the last time they held a presidential debate, and why I won't be watching them until the next one.

They're now asking about Hillary Clinton's soul.

Her soul.

Now they're advising her to have a foible or two, because if she's too polished, it will be somehow bad for her.

CNN, you are a shambles, and I despise you.